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Ways To Communicate So the Young Ones Will Pay Attention!

A significant part of discipline is learning how to talk with children. The way you talk to your child shows him how to communicate with others. Here are some talking suggestions I’ve learned with my children:

1. Connect before you direct

Before giving your kids instructions, bend down to your kid’s eye level and engage your kids in eye-to-eye contact to get his attention. Teach them how to focus: “Jimmy, I need your eyes.” “Jane, I need your ears.” Give exactly the same body language when listening to the child. Be sure not to make your eye contact so intense that your kid perceives it as controlling rather than connecting. You don’t want to scare them. Fear is NOT the answer (I tried that at first!)

2. Address the child

Open your request using the child’s name, “Xavier, will you please…” ( I have to use this because they will ignore me assuming I’m talking to the other child)

3. Stay brief (especially with young ones)

I try to make use of the one-sentence rule: Put the main instruction in the beginning sentence. The more time you ramble, the more likely your child will become parent-deaf. Excessive talking is an extremely typical mistake when dialoging about an issue. It increases the childs feeling that you’re not quite sure what it is you want to say. If they are able to keep you talking they will get you sidetracked.

4. Keep simple

Use short sentences with one-syllable words. LISTEN to how kids talk with each other and take note. Whenever your child shows that glazed, “I’m not paying attention” look, you are no longer being understood or even listened to.                                                                                            

5. Ask your child to repeat instructions or your request back to you

If he or she can’t, it’s too long or too difficult.

As my kids get older, I realize how important it is to have open communication and that they learn respect for me. Stayed tuned mommies because I will be sharing more ways that you can communicate with your kids.  We need to bridge this gap so that we can teach our kids better ways to make better decisions in life.